Our marriages do not always receive the quality and quantity of time and attention that they so desperately need. With work obligations, family schedules and the other hours of other things in our schedule the quiet, dependable marriage is placed on the back burner and we let outside influences become more important. It isn’t until those marriages start to create trouble that we remember them and then hope that there is still enough love and commitment left in these marriages to be turned back into healthy relationships.
This is not the intent for most of us but we let the outside influences become more important to us then our own marriages. Sometimes friends and family can become more problem then help when it comes to marriage. Friends want you to spend time with them and often at the expense of spending quality time with your man. Having time with friends are important and to schedule some special time with them can be fun but don’t let all your free time get eaten by social engagements that don’t include your spouse. Family can also take up time that needs to be dedicated to your marriage and the bettering of it. Be truthful with them about your time and most of them will understand and agree you need to be with your spouse.
An ugly outside influence that can jeopardize your marriage is addiction. It doesn’t matter what you are addicted to, work, drugs, gambling anything but your marriage is harmful. The easy solution to this problem is to never let it develop; never give yourself permission for this behavior to happen in the beginning. If you are already dealing with it then tell your spouse and then get help. A person with that personality trait will need help from a professional to get control of the addictive behavior.
Another influence that can hurt your marriage doesn’t necessarily come from the outside but from yourself. The negativity that a person can feel towards one’s own spouse and their marriage can be one of the worse destructive forces that there can be. The negative thoughts can be feed and grown or they can be starved and die. Remembering that your spouse is only human and will screw up so allow for the human element but if you can see that there is a true desire on your spouse’s part then you have to get real about what you really want in your marriage.
I believe the moral of this story is don’t let your marriage get to the point where outside influences can have such an impact. Guard and take care of your marriage, realize what a gift it is and make it a priority to keep it above any outside influences. That way the marriage always gets the best of you.
Ron and Shawn make up the “Odd Couple.” We are a husband and wife team who have been together for the last 27 years. We have laugh, cried, fought, made up, and made more mistakes then any two people could. Through it all we have raised the greatest three kids in the world! We would like to offer you a free report we put together titled 10 Marriage Help Tips Report with video. Click here for the report. Here is a picture of us at the World Famous Ft Worth, TX Stockyards