Summer time brings weddings; we know this well since it’s the second summer in a row
where one of our own kids has gotten married. It is a fun and exciting time with all the planning and preparing for the event. But the couple who are planning on uniting and spending the rest of their lives together need to do more then just find the venue, agree on the menu and cake and plan the honeymoon. There are some important things to talk about, take care of and agree upon before the big “I do.” There are five things that need to be taken care of to start their marriages out right.
One of the things most couples do when they first meet is to talk about who they are, what they are doing as well as the dreams they have for the future. These dreams should help the other person to decide if the person is one they could build a future with. If either one of you have to alter your dreams to much it might be an indicator that future problems could occur. You don’t want resentment to build in a relationship because of someone trying to live a life where their dreams had to be given up on so you could be together.
Another thing to look at is if the employment or career of a person agrees with the other. If one of you wants to go to continue their education for their career that might create problems for the other if they have to travel for their job. Being honest in what you do and what you want from your career with the other person will save you from a lot of heartache down the road.
As a young couple starts talking about marriage an area that needs to be addressed is that of family. Do you both want children? If so, how many, when do you both want to start a family? This is probably one of the least talked about topics of marriage that makes the biggest difference. Once a baby enters your family that is when true change really occurs because it is no longer all about yourselves but also about a baby. If there is a disagreement in this area that would send up a large red flag for both people to take care of before marriage.
The subject of money is another item that can cause fracture in a relationship. Get this subject hammered out with both parties in agreement. Don’t be quiet if you don’t agree with what your partner is saying about their view of how money will be handled in your marriage. There is no right or wrong way for this to be agree upon, some couples have joint accounts, some have a household account and separate personal accounts. Which ever way you decide to handle your money isn’t important. What is important is that there is total agreement with both people.
The next area to iron out before marriage would be short term goals. This includes things like when do you both want to buy a house, what kind of car do you plan on purchasing? The best way for couples to do this is talk about within a year what each of you would like to do and decide what needs to happen to make those goals happen. This gives you a united purpose and something to work together on.
So if you know anyone who is in a serious relationship and thinking of getting married send them this Top Five Things to Start Your Marriage Out Right article. It could save them a lifetime of pain and hurt with just a little planning.
Ron and Shawn make up the “Odd Couple.” We are a husband and wife team who have
been together for the last 27 years. We have laugh, cried, fought, made up, and made more mistakes then any two people could. Through it all we have raised the greatest three kids in the world! We would like to offer you a free report we put together titled 10 Marriage Help Tips Report with video. Click here for the report. Here is a picture of us at the World Famous Ft Worth, TX Stockyards





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These are great items- that need to be discussed, understood, and agreed upon before the commitment is ever made and anyone is invited !
Roy A. Ackerman, Ph.D., E.A. recently posted..A slightly different survey…
So true Roy so true!
I’ve always said that my husband and I are still happily married because we agree on the big rocks not the day to day things. I define the big rocks as money, raising our children and sex. Sometimes religion and politics have to be factored in as well if they are important issues for either person.
Nicole Bandes recently posted..Why Helping Others is a Key to Getting What YOU Want
I agree Nicole if you agree with your spouse on the big things then the smaller issues can be worked out as you go. But to often couples in the beginning don’t think about even these large issues so there are problems before they even get to far into the relationship.